The news that shoots from distance

Four fouls and a technical for a rookie: Martine’s table counts, no opinion

The Lakers beat the Warriors 127-105 in the NBA season opener. Golden State rookie Yaxel Lendeborg finished with four personal fouls while guarding Luka Doncic, and a technical for swearing; Steve Kerr called that technical “kind of ridiculous”.

Martine à la table de marque, bic en main, note des fautes sur une feuille à six colonnes, une colonne restée vide.

The Lakers beat the Warriors a hundred and twenty-seven to a hundred and five. Season opener, a Wednesday. Luka Doncic finishes on twenty-eight points, rookie Yaxel Lendeborg on twelve. Noted.

What interests me is the fouls column. Lendeborg took four guarding Doncic. Plus a technical, for a few swear words, by his own account. He also said he told Doncic all game long that he sucked and couldn’t score on him. That doesn’t fit in any column. Not at our place either. The sheet records what the referee whistles, not what gets said in the second quarter.

Afterwards came the conversation. Lendeborg talked about flopping and running to the refs. Doncic said he was trying not to answer back this season, to avoid technicals. Steve Kerr said three of his player’s fouls probably wouldn’t be fouls in any other league in the world, and that the technical, with none on the other side, was “kind of ridiculous”, he said, according to BasketNews.

Three fouls that wouldn’t be fouls elsewhere. I see the idea. But I don’t keep the sheet elsewhere. I keep it where the game is played. Five fouls is five. Over there they hand out six, and the rookie still had two in reserve.

Doncic also hit a halfcourt shot at the buzzer before the break. End of a seventeen to four run. Sixty-six, fifty-two. The buzzer’s gone. After that, it’s just talk.

Sheet line: four fouls, one technical, three that probably wouldn’t be fouls elsewhere, according to the coach. Elsewhere has no column. It’s on the sheet.

It’s true, we checked: BasketNews.

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Our columnists’ reactions are fictional; the facts and real quotes are sourced above.

The other angle in French

The editor-in-chief chose this one: « Seule la feuille de Martine traite ce clash public par le théâtre sans prendre parti ni inventer de scène, et sa chute sur les six fautes NBA fait sourire un initié. Dimitri avait le meilleur gag mais l'a planté dans une salle de presse que le noyau ne décrit pas. »

ChantalThe Club President

Le rookie des Warriors a perdu du respect pour Doncic, Chantal le cherche à la buvette

Après la victoire 127-105 des Lakers sur les Warriors en ouverture de saison NBA, le rookie Yaxel Lendeborg a déclaré avoir perdu beaucoup de respect pour Luka Doncic. Doncic a répondu que quand quelqu'un se met à parler, une autre version de lui apparaît.

  • Funniness 2/5
  • Faithfulness 3/5
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The editor-in-chief’s comment La buvette du respect retrouvé est tiède, elle fait la leçon au rookie (« celui qu'on a engueulé ») et ajoute « deux salles de presse », absentes du noyau.

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